MISSING THEM

Missing them, my family, is what I am feeling tonight.

It’s new in a way. to miss someone being here for just that, is what I am thinking it is.

I have missed my children as they have left the nest, missed caring for them and their being a part of my life.

But this is different. I don’t know that I have felt this before.

I have missed friends and counselors because of needs I felt I had.

I don’t know what to do with this feeling.

I feel a bit loss in how to process it.

Maybe I am finding loneliness, alone was always what I sought, it was safe.

Now I am finding I wish they were back when they just left.

It was nice to be with people, family, who saw me and my needs, even wants the same as I saw theirs.

Who accept me, as me

To be together sharing, sitting quiet, eating and laughing.

Existing in peace and connected.

I miss my aunt and cousin who spent the week with me.

I am finding a deeper longing to have people visit me.

Just because.

I am thinking this has been building for awhile as I have been creating friendships more.

The kind where the flow goes both ways

I am more aware of how I enjoy someones presence

I notice the silence

Wish for the visits

Feel disappointed when they don’t happen

 

I am missing them

But also realize it’s ok

I can cry just a bit about it

Cause that’s what disappointment is

But then I can do something about it too

Be better about staying in touch

Cherish and pull out the together times past memories

I like missing them too on one level

It is nice to have whole memories of times with family

Ones I want

Ones I can keep

Ones that are smiling kind

I like this

Lots

So in the end

The missing them is worth it

I would rather miss them

Then not have been with them

Thank you to all my Missing Thems

You know who you are ❤