HIS NOT MINE

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PHOTO CREDIT: MIKE AND EVA STOUT

Could we with ink the ocean fill, And were the skies of parchment made,
Were every stalk on earth a quill, And every man a scribe by trade;
To write the love of God above, Would drain the ocean dry;
Nor could the scroll contain the whole,
Though stretched from sky to sky.

 

I thought about the title for this writing awhile, which is unusual for me. I even pondered what God was calling me to say, which is even more unusual. Yet, what He is telling me to share is so very special that it begs such.

His not mine, Him not me.

This is what is on my heart.

Something I have known in the words to have experienced in real-time yesterday.

His love, not mine.

Him in control, not me.

A lifeline of sorts to my emotions, to understanding the current mountain before me, to finding the pathway up

It feels like I have been stumbling around so much of late, allowing the smallest pebble to be this giant boulder stopping me in maturing with my Papa, as He wants me to.

Then yesterday someone shared something with me and oh how Abba used that

“Let love lead,” they said. “Just as you did with your children when raising them, love overcame the handicap of your childhood abuse, of having never been parented yourself. Allow love to help you now, follow it.”

Trust me, this was the last thing I wanted to do. My flesh preferring to cling to the emotions I felt I had found and had a right to… anger fueled, selfish “buts,” full of, “This person did this, that wasn’t fair,” and please pity me whining.

Yet, truth was in these thoughts my friend shared, and one thing this journey has taught me is that truth is worth pursuing not only to know, but to do… the rewards to far out weigh the cost.

Really, the cost is usually about me anyhow, my eyes on self making a mountain out of a molehill.

So God helped me as I determined to love, through His power and indwelling with in me.

“God can do anything, you know—far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! He does it not by pushing us around but by working within us, his Spirit deeply and gently within us.”  Ephesians 3:20 (MSG)

Love when I felt wronged, love when it seemed too much, simply love, His love to flow through me not mine.

Godly love with a selfless giving, one that looked at the other and desired God’s graces poured out on the situation, His everything to flow…

thHis words, not mine….

His perspective, not mine…

His patience and peace…

His everything..

th

I changed, overnight it feels, in the giving selflessly in obedience…  He has given me so much,

His peace is what I feel even as I think on that which caused so much distress yesterday and many weeks leading up to it.

 

Makes sense really,

for I am…

His, not my own.

I am, Tammy Anne of God.

Refrain:
Oh, love of God, how rich and pure!
How measureless and strong!
It shall forevermore endure—
The saints’ and angels’ song.

                                                               Verse 3 was penciled on the wall of a narrow room in an American insane asylum by a man said to have been demented.                                                                  The profound lines were discovered when they laid him in his coffin.

http://library.timelesstruths.org/music/The_Love_of_God/

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